Wanted: Female, ordained minister for full-time senior pastor position. Must be at least 50 years of age. A divorced mother would be ideal. Must be experienced in life and have a list of sins and experiences you can preach on from personal knowledge. We care especially looking for a woman who answered the call to ministry after working in other professions. If you spent time away from the church for any reason, but especially if you have questioned your faith and/or the church, please apply for this job! Salary and benefits are on your terms because we no longer believe women ministers should be offered only part-time positions with no benefits or be paid less than their male counterparts even though they are equally qualified. Send your resume’ to the First United Church of the Perpetually Imperfect, Nowhere, USA.
No church would post this, but this is the job description that I think suits me best. I haven’t lived the perfect life and I’m not a poster child for anything. But, I do believe in living life by asking and answer a question I first heard several years ago in a poem by Mary Oliver:
Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?
I want to be a servant of God.
I want to be a good and loving mother to my children.
I want to be a minister.
I want to serve others.
I want to give to others what I’ve been given.
I want to be a person who loves, is kind, and offers grace.
I want to be a person who is willing to listen, even when the words are hard.
Writing, telling stories, sharing experiences, teaching, and proclaiming are the ways in which God has gifted me to live my wild and precious life. I offer myself as a teacher, preacher, speaker, and writer to others who are searching for the answer to this question and who are looking to live into the person each of us is created to be.